Yesterday’s Question: You are the proud owner of a “new to you” boat. You’re at your new dock and you find that you don’t have midship cleat something you didn’t look for when you bought the boat. You may consider adding cleats. This addition would prove useful for “___”-”____” docking manurers and departures in strong wind and or current conditions.

Answer:  Well before I give you the answer, that seemed to get quite a different response! No follow the leader!

Now the answer — Mid ship  cleats  are used for…. Drum-roll!! Spring lines. So the answer would be Spring line maneuvers.

Today’s Question:  So you are at a dock and on the windward side and stiff breeze is blowing. You have only a single screw, lets say a sailboat. What spring line do you release first when you are leaving the dock and what gear are you in neutral, forward or reverse?

Quote: When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.

–W.C fields

Joke: Bill Gates meets Hugh Grant at a Hollywood party. They are talking and Bill says: “I’ve seen some great pictures of Divine Brown lately, I sure would like to get together with her!”
Hugh replies: “Well Bill, you know ever since our incident, her price has skyrocketed, she’s charging a small fortune.”
Bill (with a chuckle): “Hugh, money’s no object to me. What’s her number.” So, Hugh gives Bill her number and Bill sets up a date.
They meet & after they finish, Bill is lying there in ecstasy, mumbling “God…now I know why you chose the name Divine.”
To which she replies: “Thank you, Bill…..and now I know how you chose the name ….. Microsoft.”

DVD Back to the Basics of Boating: Improving Your Boating Skills & Knowledge

Yesterday’s Question: well everyone got it right!

Today’s question: You are the proud owner of a “new to you” boat. You’re at your new dock and you find that you don’t have midship cleat something you didn’t look for when you bought the boat. You may consider adding cleats. This addition would prove useful for “___”-”____” docking manurers and departures in strong wind and or current conditions.

Let’s see how you do with a fill in the blanks question instead of multiple choice.

Quote: Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.

–Yogi Berra

Joke: What letters did the man recite to his boat when he ran out of fuel ?
( O-I-C-U-R-M-T )

PERKO CHROMALEX LOCKING GAS FILL 1.5″

Yesterday’s Question: A fishing vessel casualty must be reported to the coastguard if ____.

A: loss of life

Today’s question: In what year was the US power squadron formed?

A: 1912

B: 1914

C: 1920

D: 1926

Quote:   If the Spray discovered no continents on her voyage, it may be that there were no more continents to be discovered. She did not seek new worlds, or sail to pow-wow about the dangers of the sea.

– Joshua Slocum

Joke: A sailor was caught AWOL as he tried to sneak on board his ship at about 3 am. The chief petty officer spied him and ordered the sailor to stop. Upon hearing the sailor’s lame explanation for his tardiness, the officer ordered the sailor to, “Take this broom and sweep every link on this anchor chain by morning or it’s the brig for you!” The sailor picked up the broom and commenced performing his charge. As he began to sweep, a Tern landed on the broom handle. The lad picked the tern off the broom handle, giving the bird a toss. The Tern left, only to return and light once again on the broom handle. The sailor went through the same routine over and over again. He couldn’t get any cleaning done because he could only sweep at the chain once or twice before the blasted bird returned. In the morning the chief petty officer, came to check the sailor and his work. “What in the heck have you been doing all night? This chain is no cleaner than when you started! What have you to say for yourself, sailor?” barked the chief. “Honest, chief,” came the reply, “I tossed a Tern all night and couldn’t sweep a link

Shur-Lok MOPS & BROOMS

Friday’s Question: How many nautical miles equal a nautical star?

Answer: D: none of the above

Note: A little history on the nautical star “TATTOO”. This is a tattoo originated by sailors as you would expect. The history of how and when this tattoo became a symbol of passage is, let’s say vague. As I researched this I came up with: If you sailed over 5000 NM you were entitled to get the star.

If you survived a dangerous passage where Mother Nature took the lives of fellow crew members you were entitled to get a star tattoo. You could have sailed only 10 feet! and you didn’t have to meet the 5K rule.

So if one of the answers was 5000 miles I would have accepted that as a correct answer.

Today’s Question: A fishing vessel casualty must be reported to the coastguard if ____.

A: loss of life

B: An injury requiring only first aid.

C: $10,000 in property damage

D: loss of equipment that doesn’t reduce the vessel’s manuverability.

Quote: The man who smiles when something goes wronghas thought of someone to blame it on.  –Robert Bloch

Joke: “Hey, you know what is going on over in Iran with the election? Have you been following that? Oh, it’s crazy. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has declared himself a winner. Had a victory party. And he came out at the victory party and he thanked the 148% of the people who voted for him.” –David Letterman

 $57.96 With full-featured scan capability and large LCD backlighted display, the compact Mariner VHF/FM Radio will squelch your old ideas about small radio performance. Sized to fit in tight places, priced to fit tight budgets!

Yesterday’s Question:  In terms of depth, 15 fathoms equals ________.

Answer: C: a Shackle

Y’all are sharp!

Today’s Question: How many nautical miles equal a nautical star?

A: 1000

B: 100

C: 10

D: none of the above

Quote: “The sea—this truth must be confessed—has no generosity. No display of manly qualities—courage, hardihood, endurance, faithfulness—has ever been known to touch its irresponsible consciousness of power.”

– Joseph Conrad

Joke:  A doctor, a dentist and an attorney were in a boat together when a wave came along and washed them all overboard. Unable to get back into the boat, they decided two would hold on to the boat and the third would swim to shore for help. They noticed that there were hundreds of sharks between them and land. Without a word the lawyer took off! As he swam the sharks move aside. The dentist yelled, “it’s a miracle!” “No” , said the doctor, “That’s professional courtesy!”

Yesterday’s Question: Flags are used at the coastguard station to indicate weather conditions. One of these is wrong, which one?

Answer:

C: one square red  pennant with black square center and one triangle red pennant.

Today’s Question:  In terms of depth, 15 fathoms equals ________.

A: Two Ranks

B: a wist

C: a Shackle

D: a sosher

Quote: Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

– Chinese Proverb

And a Joke:  Chinese proverb is crap, Fact: Give a man a fish and he may eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he has to buy bamboo rods, Graphite reels, Monofiliment line, neoprene waders, tackle boxes, lures, spinners, 20 pocket vest, fish finders, depth sounders, radar, boats, trailers, GPS, coolers and beer. and probably won’t catch a thing!

Yesterday’s Question: You have been kicked off your sailing team for cleating your sheet, leaving your post for binoculars and spilling your beer on deck. One of the teem members on the “ALL GIRL” boat is sick and can not be in the race. You are asked to sub for her just this one time “pretty please”. You have agreed to crewing. While racing the Captain orders you to take the helm so she can go below to tinkle. She commands from down below. “RIGHT 15 DEGREES RUDDER” You _________.

B: Reply “right 15 degrees rutter”

Today’s Question:  Flags are used at the coastguard station to indicate weather conditions. One of these is wrong, which one?

A: Small craft warning - one triangle red pennant

B: Gale - two red triangle pennants

C: one square red  pennant with black square center and one triangle red pennant.

D: two square red pennants with black square centers.

Quote: If you don’t like your job, you don’t strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That’s the American way.

- - - Homer Simpson

And a joke: A man was sent to Hell for his sins. As he was being taken to his place of eternal torment, he passed a room where a lawyer was having an intimate encounter with a beautiful young woman.
“What a ripoff,” the man muttered. “I have to roast for all eternity, and that lawyer gets to spend it with a beautiful woman.”
Jabbing the man with his pitchfork, the escorting demon snarled, “Who are you to question that woman’s punishment?”

  Can you believe $84.18!!!

Yesterday’s Question: You’re out for the area’s weekly sail boat race and coming up on the first mark. The all girl sail boat you partied with in the cove on Friday is also in the race. they are close hauled on a port tack, you are on a close hauled starboard tack. By the way no one got lucky on Friday but some friendships were made that look promising. You’re the grinder on your yacht. Your Captain has hailed the yacht letting them know you have the right of way but the other boat isn’t changing course. Do you ________?
B: Follow the Captains orders to hold steady. (Way to stay the course people)

Today’s Question: You have been kicked off your sailing team for cleating your sheet, leaving your post for binoculars and spilling your beer on deck. One of the teem members on the “ALL GIRL” boat is sick and can not be in the race. You are asked to sub for her just this one time “pretty please”. You have agreed to crewing. While racing the Captain orders you to take the helm so she can go below to tinkle. She commands from down below. “RIGHT 15 DEGREES RUDDER” You _________.

A: Assume she is talking to bottom.

B: Reply “right 15 degrees rutter”

C: Reply “rudder is right 15 degrees”

D: Reply “I hope your not hovering over my beer!”

Quote: “A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on” - Samuel Goldwyn.

Joke:  Pat and Mick both got jobs as Bartenders on one the big cruise ships based at Southampton. The ship left v.early in the morning from Southampton, and their shifts did not start until 7.00pm (19.00 hrs). Pat was to work on deck “A” and Mick on deck “B”. after 20 mins into the shift Pat did’nt have one customer so he rang Mick to see if he was busy. Mick said, no i hav’nt served one customer either. Mick went on to say, “not to worry, they have all gone to listen to the music” What music said pat. “oh” said Mick did’nt you hear on the tannoy system that “there is a band on the ship”

Friday’s Question: You have just anchored in a cove to spend the night swinging on the hook. A large sailboat comes into the cove and you notice that a bikini clad helmsperson is alone on deck. As the boat approaches another female crew member appears on deck and goes forward to drop their anchor. They are too close to you and their swing circle overlaps yours. Do you ______?

 B: Hail the boat on your radio and inform them of their error

Note: That one you will not find in the Captains License exam. For the heck of it lets do it again.

Today’s Question: You’re out for the area’s weekly sail boat race and coming up on the first mark. The all girl sail boat you partied with in the cove on Friday is also in the race. they are close hauled on a port tack, you are on a close hauled starboard tack. By the way no one got lucky on Friday but some friendships were made that look promising. You’re the grinder on your yacht. Your Captain has hailed the yacht letting them know you have the right of way but the other boat isn’t changing course. Do you ________?

A: Release your sheet and say it was an accident and allow the girls to go by on their tack.

B: Follow the Captains orders to hold steady.

C: Put down your beer and get the binoculars.

D: Cleat of your sheet, stand up and wave like crazy

Quote:  “The sea’s most powerful spell is romance.”
H. W. Tilman

Joke: well definition really

Bare Poles: Sailing with unclothed persons from Eastern Europe.
 

Yesterday’s Question: A 5° course error will result in being one mile of course in _______.

Answer:  C: 11.5 miles

Today’s Question: You have just anchored in a cove to spend the night swinging on the hook. A large sailboat comes into the cove and you notice that a bikini clad helmsperson is alone on deck. As the boat approaches another female crew member appears on deck and goes forward to drop their anchor. They are too close to you and their swing circle overlaps yours. Do you ______?

A: Put down your beer and get your binoculars
B: Hail the boat on your radio and inform them of their error
C: Tell them of their error and recommend you raft up
D: Do nothing

Quote: “He who loves practice without theory is like the sailor who boards ship without a rudder and compass and never knows where he may cast.”

Leonardo Da vinci

Joke: While shopping for vacation clothes, a wife and her husband  passed a display of bathing suits.
It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since she had even considered buying a bathing suit.
so she sought her husband’s advice. “What do you think?” she asked. “Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?”
His reply was “Better get a bikini, You’d never get it all in one.”

Our friends on  S/V Maelstrom have checked in. They are way out there almost half way to the Azores.

here is the link: S/V Maelstrom